Dear Steven,
I had an incredible urge to see how many M&Ms I could fit in my mouth today. Do you ever get those feelings? Something you just have to do? Like when you just have to buy only black shoes every day for a week? Or when you just have to go to Tanzania? So you just go? Do you know what I mean? Well, this was one of those feelings. I just had to do it. So, I bought twenty of those little bags. I didn’t think I’d be able to fit in more than three or four, but it’s better to have more and not need them than to need them and not have enough. Am I right? … … drumroll … … Eight!! Yes, you heard me right! It turns out I can fit eight packs of M&Ms in my mouth at once! Eight! I bet that surprised you. It surprised me too! I couldn’t close my mouth but they stayed in. I had this thick chocolatey drool running down my chin. It went all down the front of my new suit. Ruined it. But, eight packs! Nobody else in the bank seemed as excited as I was. Maybe it was because I couldn’t talk properly. I just kind of groaned at people with chocolate pouring out of my mouth. The security asked me to leave in the end. I never did get the loan I went in for. Oh well. Still, eight packs!! I bet you couldn’t do that!
Your friend,
Kevin